Orientation

The point of view set forth by Coretta Scott King is in response to a number of African American religious leaders (including her minister daughter) who have spoken out against comparisons of Gay rights with the Negro Civil Rights movement. Many believe that we are currently in a moral war, and they may be right. However, we might be addressing the wrong moral issue.

(Jo and Teresa, together for 19 years, and their three children - Jake, 12; Matthew, 9; and Bena, 2.)

Currently, the argument is over whether non-heterosexual people and relationships are right or wrong, moral or immoral. But the real moral question facing our society is, is it morally right for us to discriminate against others - even if they violate our religious principles? When it comes to the morality of gender orientation, everyone on all sides has an opinion. We believe that, while this might be an interesting exercise in religious inquiry, it has no bearing on whether gay men, women and their relationships should be denied equal protection under the law. We submit the following:
Discrimination is the act of making exclusionary and damaging decisions toward another individual based on a particular grouping characteristic. These decisions range from genocide and slavery, to hatred, assaults and verbal abuse, to laws that render one group less protected than another. This applies as clearly to orientation issues as it does to racial, gender, age, religious, and cultural issues.

Alternately, we believe that every religious group should have the right to determine for themselves how they feel about orientation issues, whether to allow certain people to participate in their group or not, and to what degree. We also believe that in order for religious freedom rights to be real, they must allow groups to define their particular religion as off-limits to other groups based the criteria of their choice - including gender, race, theological positions, cultural traditions, religious affiliation or personal practices. They should be able to decide who gets married in their church, which marriages they will honor and the criteria for membership in their organization - whether others approve or not. We trust that people within their individual religious contexts will work to help their traditions find the balance that is appropriate for them.

We believe that resolution of these two points of view is in an understanding of the necessary distinction between religious views and civil/societal law. We submit that even religions with prohibitions against non-heterosexual people/relationships should see the importance of supporting the civil rights of others who differ. The same rationale that guarantees full and equal rights to all religions - even those with opposing beliefs - should apply to people of all orientations and full protection of their spousal and familial relationships.

When we think about it, we become aware of a common discrimination-based fallacy - that of moral attribution - the belief that gay relationships are inherently immoral and straight relationships are inherently moral. However, there is no correlation between orientation and morality. In fact, orientation tells us no more about the moral fiber of an individual than hair color or shoe size. Gay men and women are neither less nor more moral than their heterosexual counterparts and the only fair judgment would be one applied to all people, based on personal character and contribution to society. The quality of a person's love (generosity, caring, and other-centeredness vs. rampant self-centeredness) is far more telling than the gender, race or religion of the beloved.

We look forward to the day when all relationships between two adults - whether mixed or same gendered, mixed or same race - will be judged by common merit standards - its contribution to the quality of life of the participants, enhancement of their contribution to society, and the degree to which it eases societal burdens or supports a stronger human community.

And finally, we owe it to younger generations to both model and pass on 'responsibility' skills - including sexual responsibility (protection from disease, preparedness to handle pregnancy) emotional/spiritual responsibility (managing the relationship so that both partners benefit and neither are hurt), societal responsibility (what the relationship contributes to society), and human responsibility (how we view and treat others).

(Del and Phyllis, together for 51 years, Become the first same sex couple to Marry - San Francisco, Feb, 2004)

Amnesty International elegantly states it in this way: "Amnesty International maintains that all people, regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity, should have access to all human rights described in the Universal Declaration of Human Rights." (more)

More on this topic from Rod Washington
Family Value
Content of Our Character
Why Christians Should Be Supportive of Gays' Right to Marry
Christian Parents of Gay Teens

Issues:
Orientation and Civil Rights
Orientation and Religion
Orientation and Family
Orientation and the Human Community

Orientation and Civil Rights
Former law dean Herma Hill Kay examines same-sex marriage
A primer on same sex marriage, civil unions, etc

Orientation and Religion
Center Aims to Offer a Religious View for Gays: Pacific School of Religion, the multi-denominational seminary of the United Church of Christ challenges prevailing perceptions that Christianity resoundingly rejects homosexuality.
Imams join plea for gay tolerance: Muslim religious leaders have joined Christian and Jewish leaders for the first time in issuing a joint plea for tolerance for gay people.
Same Sex Marriage, in the Jewish Tradition
Whosoever - An online magazine for GLBT Christians
AL Fatiha (GLBT Muslims)

Orientation and Family
Family Pride Coalition
A Peace Activist Is Born "Our job was to confront Jerry Falwell. To tell him our stories. To let him see our faces and to know us. But Mel White told us that our GOAL our OWN personal, spiritual renewal…
Randall Terry's Son Comes Out

Orientation and the Human Community
Hate Crimes Prevention Center
Not in our town
NOT IN OUR TOWN is a national movement that encourages community response to hate crimes. The project combines PBS broadcast, grassroots events, educational outreach and online activities to help communities battling hate talk to-and learn from-each other. Since 1995, NOT IN OUR TOWN has chronicled positive community organizing stories and provided practical tools to stimulate dialogue.
Anti gay violence project